Lap Swimming Etiquette 101

Posted on 23. Jul, 2009 by Derrick in Road Riding, Triathlon training

I got to the pool early yesterday to hit a short hard 750m swim. When I got there, all the lanes were full. I looked at the lane markings and absolutely NO ONE was following the “slow lap” “medium lap” and “fast lap” signs. To further my frustration, no one was circle lap swimming either, which was also clearly posted.

I don’t know if it was because it was predominantly older folks, and they simply didn’t give a shit, or all of theme were illiterate. I do know that it was a cluster fuck of people swimming everything from doggy paddle to brest stroke. So I picked what looked like the safest lane with the two most experienced looking swimmers.

I hopped in the lane and talked to the first guy and he said that he had no problem with me joining their lane. I asked him if it would be OK if we swam with a circle lap, and he said that would be fine, but the other guy in that lane had been sticking to one side. I then waited for the other gentleman to join us at the end of the pool. When I asked him if we could “circle lap swim” he looked at me with an odd look. I then drew a circle with my finger in the water indicating a clockwise lap and he simply stated “yeah, I’m not stupid, i know what a circle is”. I thought to myself, well you may know your shapes but your a fuckin idiot because you cant read for shit. He then jumped out and said “I’m done anyways”. Well then, why the hell did you take the time to be an asshole?

I wish he had stayed in the pool, I would liked to have peed right in front of him just for him to swim through it. I did see him later mackin on some grandma bun, and I wanted to walk up to her and say “This guy has a tiny dick” and walk off. Old fuckers like that annoy me.

So later that day I decided to take Floyd and Hyon up lookout mountain for some hill climbing on our bikes. I love that ride late at night. Perfect temperature, and its fun as shit to bomb down the mountain roads with just a bike light. We all timed ourselves on the way up. Hyon made it up in 33 minutes, I made it up in 37, and Floyd took 43 minutes.

Good fun, tonight is running night with Guinness and Summer.

- Derrick